In this episode of the Kabir Vani Podcast, Dr. Rebecca Pinto, a physiotherapist, content creator, and meditation enthusiast, joins Kabir for a candid and unscripted conversation. From relationships and self-love to past lives, spirituality, and mindset, Rebecca opens up about her journey, challenges, and philosophy of living a balanced life.
Why Many Fear Marriage Today
Rebecca believes that people are not against marriage itself—they are afraid of repeating what they have witnessed in their parents’ or relatives’ marriages. Many women, for example, hesitate to take on household duties because they saw their mothers exhausted, unappreciated, and burdened. Similarly, young men fear responsibility because they never learned healthy ways to express emotion or share partnership roles.
She explains: “It’s not that people don’t want to get married. They just don’t want to burn their hands after seeing broken examples.”
Relationships as Learning Grounds
Unlike academics or careers, no one teaches us how to build healthy relationships. Parents rarely model communication and conflict resolution, so we learn through partners themselves. Rebecca stresses that relationships succeed only when both partners are willing to communicate openly and set healthy boundaries.
A key takeaway:
If you want care, ask for it.
Don’t expect the other person to read your mind.
Over time, both partners evolve and learn how to support each other.
The Burden of “Being Good”
The conversation also touched on how society judges people by one mistake, ignoring their thousands of contributions. Rebecca questions: “Does one wrong action cancel out every good thing someone did?” This reflects her belief that good and bad are relative, and that humans should not live under the crushing burden of always trying to be “good” in everyone’s eyes.
Spirituality, God, and Past Lives
Rebecca’s spiritual outlook is shaped by a mix of belief and questioning. She respects God but does not always align with ritual practices. For her, true spirituality is about kindness, clean intentions, and good karma.
She also shared a profound personal experience with past life regression therapy. While working on her fear of heights, she unexpectedly slipped into what felt like a past life memory—becoming aware of another woman’s body, emotions, and surroundings that she felt were her own. This convinced her that souls carry impressions from one life to another, even though she remains cautious about carrying forward past pain.
Self-Love vs People-Pleasing
Though Rebecca often encourages others to practice self-love, she admits she struggles to prioritize it for herself. Making others happy gives her far more joy than spending on her own needs. Kabir reframed self-love as setting healthy boundaries—protecting one’s peace, refusing disrespect, and maintaining independence in relationships.
This sparked a larger insight: when you love and respect yourself, you attract partners who do the same. Without self-love, relationships often become imbalanced, with one partner expecting the other to fill their emptiness.
Men, Emotions, and Safe Spaces
Another powerful section of the podcast was about men’s emotional health. Rebecca pointed out how men are allowed to cry on a cricket field but rarely in real life. Generational conditioning tells men to “fix problems” rather than express feelings, which often leads to suppression and mental health struggles.
Kabir emphasized the need for safe spaces for men to share openly, reminding listeners that equality in relationships means catering to the needs of both genders.
Finding Balance in Life
The conversation ended with Rebecca’s reminder: “No one on their deathbed ever said, I worked really well. What matters is balance—between work, relationships, family, and self.”
Her philosophy echoes the essence of the podcast: to explore life, spirituality, and human connection with honesty and balance.
Listen to the Full Podcast
You can catch the full conversation with Dr. Rebecca Pinto on the Kabir Vani Podcast, available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and Amazon Prime Music.
