Healing Narcissistic Wounds with EFT: Seema Gorowara’s Insights

Narcissism has become one of the most widely discussed topics in recent years, and for good reason. Studies suggest that nearly 60% of people display narcissistic traits, often leaving behind trails of broken families, emotional scars, and silent trauma. But what if these painful encounters are not just roadblocks — what if they are catalysts for growth?

On the Kabir Vani Podcast, Seema Gorowara, a certified EFT Practitioner and Trainer, shared how survivors of narcissistic abuse can use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to release trauma, rebuild self-worth, and create healthy futures. Her compassionate approach blends science, spirituality, and practical tools for anyone navigating toxic relationships, childhood wounds, addictions, or self-doubt.

What Is EFT and Why It Works

EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is often called “tapping therapy.” It involves gently tapping on specific acupuncture meridian points while acknowledging emotions. This process clears blocked energy, releases stored trauma, and brings the nervous system back into balance.

Unlike affirmations that often fail when negative emotions dominate, EFT works by first releasing the stored “junk” — anger, guilt, shame, sadness — so that positive affirmations have space to land.

“We don’t end with affirmations because unless you remove the crap stuck in your body, there’s no space for new energy.” – Seema Gorowara

After tapping, people often feel lighter, calmer, and clearer, with many even reporting drowsiness as the body resets itself.

Living with Narcissists: The Invisible Scars

Seema explains that narcissists follow predictable patterns: love-bombing, devaluation, discarding, and hoovering. Victims are gaslighted, manipulated, and often left doubting their own reality.

• Gaslighting destroys confidence — you start questioning your own memory and judgment.
• Control tactics include financial abuse, monitoring calls, even installing cameras.
• Children suffer too — some are spoiled as “golden children,” while others are scapegoated or treated as invisible.

These scars are often worse than physical wounds because they are unseen. Survivors struggle with self-blame, people-pleasing, guilt, and anxiety.

“When you end a relationship with a narcissist, you become so different that it’s hard to recognize yourself.” – Seema Gorowara

EFT for Trauma and Emotional Release

Narcissistic survivors carry layers of trauma: grief, guilt, fear, shame. EFT provides a structured way to release them gently:

• Acknowledge the feeling – sadness, overwhelm, anger.
• Locate it in the body – color, weight, vibration.
• Tap through meridian points – repeating reminder phrases (“this sadness,” “this guilt”).
• Release it gradually – often reducing intensity from 10 to 4 to 0 in minutes.

Even if survivors don’t believe in it, tapping still works. The act itself shifts energy and reduces intensity of emotions.

Children, Parenting, and Surrogate Tapping

One of the most powerful uses of EFT is in protecting children from narcissistic environments.

• Parents can tap with children to help them release anger or sadness.
• Surrogate tapping allows parents to tap on themselves on behalf of their child.
• Even infants can benefit from gentle tapping on their backs.

This helps break cycles of trauma where one parent is abusive and the other struggles to shield the child.

Addiction, Phobias, and Everyday Issues

Addictions often stem from memories linked to emotions. For example, one client craved chocolate cake because it was tied to joyful childhood weekends with her grandmother. Once EFT separated the memory from the craving, the addiction faded.

Similarly, phobias and allergies can dissolve when the root memory is addressed. A woman with “apple phobia” traced it back to parents fighting during dinner — the fruit became linked to fear. Resolving the memory ended the phobia.

Self-Love and Forgiveness

Perhaps the hardest part for survivors is relearning self-love. After years of devaluation, many believe they are unworthy of love. EFT gently restores this by:

• Releasing beliefs like “I am not lovable.”
• Encouraging daily affirmations in mirrors (“I love you, you are wonderful”).
• Healing childhood memories where rejection first planted self-doubt.

Forgiveness — of self and others — is another area EFT helps. Survivors often blame themselves for missing red flags. Tapping helps release resentment and shame, leading to organic forgiveness.

“If I don’t love myself, no one else will love me. EFT brings you back to that state of self-love.” – Seema Gorowara

Narcissism vs Toxic Relationships

While all narcissistic relationships are toxic, not all toxic relationships involve narcissists. Toxic people may display one or two traits, but narcissists tick every box — entitlement, lack of empathy, gaslighting, rage, and control.

They exist not just as spouses but also as parents, friends, bosses, and colleagues. In all forms, they leave their targets questioning their worth.

Yet, Seema reframes this: narcissists may be the unintended catalysts for growth. Without them, many survivors wouldn’t have turned to healing, spirituality, or self-work.

Healing After Leaving a Narcissist

Leaving is only the beginning. Survivors carry trauma bonds that feel like love, making them yearn for abusers even after escape. EFT helps by:

• Releasing guilt for leaving.
• Dissolving trauma bonds mistaken for affection.
• Rebuilding clarity and self-worth before entering new relationships.

Without healing, people risk repeating patterns, attracting new toxic partners, or sabotaging healthy relationships with suspicion.

Seema’s Programs and Community

Seema’s mission is to take EFT to every household in India. She runs:

• Weekly Tapathons (Wednesdays) – group sessions introducing EFT and guiding participants through tapping.
• 3-Day Certification Trainings – intensive, offline programs where participants practice techniques and become certified EFT practitioners.
• Mentoring Circles (Sundays) – ongoing support for her trainees with Q&A, practice sessions, and community healing.
• Narcissistic Warriors Program – a low-cost, 8-week handholding program for survivors of narcissistic abuse, offering tools, techniques, and a safe, confidential community.

She emphasizes affordability because narcissistic abuse often leaves survivors financially broken.

Conclusion: From Pain to Power

Narcissistic abuse shatters confidence, destroys trust, and leaves invisible scars. But healing is possible. Through EFT tapping, survivors can release stored trauma, rebuild self-worth, and step into healthier relationships.

As Seema reminds us, even if 60% of people are narcissists, they exist to push us toward growth. Survivors who choose healing become true warriors, stronger, wiser, and more compassionate.

You can listen to the full conversation with Seema Gorowara on the Kabir Vani Podcast, available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and Amazon Prime Music.